Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Should you date someone from the same planet?

In decades gone by, the big question used to be: Should you date someone in the office? The traditional wisdom being No, you should not, because:

1. Other people in the office will find out (sooner or later) and it could be embarrassing.

2. It upsets the balance of power. If you're a manager and you date one of your direct reports, "favoritism" becomes an issue. Even if you're peers, it upsets the perceived relationships of the two of you with coworkers. No one knows if they can tell you something in confidence without it leaking to your partner. (Etc.)

3. If you eventually break up, you have to stare your ex-partner in the face every day at work. Highly uncomfortable (potentially).

So the usual advice is: Don't date someone who works in the same office where you do. But that's no longer logical. In a world of constant connectivity, we're all in the same virtual office, all the time. Think about it. Everyone you work with (whether they work from home, come in to an office, or whatever) has e-mail, most are probably on Facebook or Twitter (or both), etc. People Tweet stuff or IM stuff without you even knowing about it. Pretty soon it becomes clear that the world is a very small place indeed. The world is your office, my friend.

So don't worry about dating someone in the office. Your office is planet Earth. The question is whether you should date someone from Mars.


  1. You especially shouldn't date somebody from the office if you are married, far away from your spouse (say, in another country like the Netherlands) and your new play thing is the intern girl which is aspiring to be the office whore by jumping (nearly) naked your co-worker Thierry and sleeping with guys even if she does not like to have sex in geneal but is fine with having your spouse run errands for her while all the while your spouse suspects nothing because she is in another fucking country! Yeah Manja Neuhaus from Zwickau Germany, I mean you! You ugly little duckling who won't grow into a swan! May life hold only guys in store for you which leave you as soon as they find you boring because there is nothing behind after jumping at men naked! They won't love you - just use you.

  2. I am sorry about the pain you've caused yourself, V., but the truth is that I never had sex with your husband. We got pretty close after a while, because I was able to understand him and his needs. I even admit that I was in love with him, platonically, but he is still your husband and always will be, because you're doing such a great job with guilting him into this. Did you ever wonder why your husband left to work in another country although he could get a better payment in Germany? Because of you we ended our friendship. This is now almost two years ago. When will you get over your rage and start being a better wife instead of stalking everybody who is close to your husband? I remember that T. told me how you terrorized this girl in the US so badly that she had to call the police. And may I remind you that there is a law against stalking in Germany, too?
    Now please, stop calling me, stop texting me, stop registering my e-mail address and telephone number to spam websites, and please delete these comments. We can discuss this like grown-ups if you want to.

  3. OK fine...he probably told you by now...I did not have sex with your husband. But "somebody else" did, here is the photo http://alturl.com/qp2o

  4. Dear M. We would have done things like grown ups if once - just once- you would have picked up the phone. I tried talking to you and _you_ didn't want to talk to me.
    As you will learn I have been subjected to abuse and you are lucky you didn't get that. No, you even turned him against me. Because of you I lost my baby. Did he ever tell you?

    Let's talk. You know the number.

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